Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Chapter 4 {LYTD}

Had a little freak out today.
Tried to add two classes for winter session to get ahead.
Realized my financial aid (if you could even call it that) has already been on spent and I have to pay it out my own money... within 24 hours.
Bill of both classes $1386
*INSERT CANCELLING CLASSES HERE*
For Yoga and Intro to Jazz class? What?!
I'll wait until I can take ballroom or aerobics kickboxing. 
But ugggh. My winter break is like a month of nothing but work...  I might go crazy.


Chapter 4

            It only took a few weeks until I realized Sam had a little temper problem. It would be little things that would piss him off, and I could see his face get red and the steam about to blow. I could tell he was trying to control it for my sake. Every time he would get mad at a waitress for being too slow, a car cutting him off, or something else not going exactly his way, he would apologize for being so short fused. But, I pushed it aside. He was too perfect in other areas, so he had to have a fault. Apparently having a short temper was one of them.

                                    *                                  *                                  *
March

            “What the fuck is her problem?” he asked me one day while we were at a gig in New York. “Is she fucking deaf?!” he barked. It’s not like she could actually hear him, some band called The Parking Lot was playing some of the worst music I’ve ever heard. “And what the fuck is wrong with this band? Is it me or do they suck?”
“No, Sam, they do suck. But seriously, babe, calm down. The waitress will be here when she gets here; it’s not a big deal.”
“I know,” he blushed. “Sorry,”
“There you are!” Kendall came over with her long legs and short skirt. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” She had a cosmo in her hand and was sipping.
“Hey Kendall,” I waved. This time I made sure I wore the proper clothes to The New York Underground. I wasn’t going to be in a ball gown like last time. This time I had on a little blue dress that wasn’t so short it was skanky, but short enough so that I wouldn’t be allowed to wear it in school. Sam told me I looked really good, and so did Kendall and Steph when I saw them.
“Are you playing tonight?” she asked.
“Yeah, but just waiting for Brooke’s friends right now.” He turned to me. “Where are they, anyway?”
“I have no idea. I don’t keep track of them all the time.”
Sam rolled his eyes and pulled me closer as a few guys walked by and checked me out. He hated when guys did this, but he rarely said anything. He would always just pull me closer and whisper, “Why do you have to be so beautiful?”
I kissed his cheek and felt my phone buzzing in my chest. That was just about the only place to keep my phone when I was wearing a dress this tight.

Anna: Hey, where are you?
Brooke: Inside. Where are you?
Anna: Outside. We’re at the roof and we told them we’re with you and Sam but they won’t let us in.
Brooke: Be right there.

I turned to Sam. “I’m going to get Anna and Brian; I’ll be right back, okay?” I kissed him once and he let go of my hand as I walked away. I could feel him staring as I walked backstage and went to go talk to Brock. “Hey,” one of the guys that was about to play called. I turned around and was face to face with a guy with just about every inch of him tattooed. He had snake bite piercings and an eyebrow ring. “I’m Nate.”
“Brooke,” I said, looking around for Brock. He wasn’t near the door and I couldn’t open it unless he gave me the okay. I knew I had to be careful around here because I didn’t want to get Sam in trouble, which would get the band in trouble, which would mean I would be in trouble.
“How are you doing?” Nate asked.
“Pretty good. Have you seen Brock?” I asked him. Seriously, where was he?
“Nah,” he was tuning his guitar. “Where you from, Brooke?”
“Um, Winchester, Mass.” I said. I felt Nate give me the once over and smile. I was instantly creeped out. Finally Brock came back and saw me standing there. “Brooke! I was just looking for you.” He said. He was an enormous black guy that worked as a bouncer/security head at a few of the city’s most happening places. Over the last few weeks, The Debate had come here one other time, so that the boys could talk to Steph’s dad about their ‘future’. So, we had had lunch with the staff, letting me to get to know them better and by name. “There are two kids out there that say they’re with you and Sam. I didn’t know if they were or not. Come and check?”
“Yeah,” he opened the door and Anna and Brian were waiting. “They’re with us,” I smiled at him. They looked freezing.  It was late March, but that didn’t mean New York or Massachusetts knew that. It was still only fifty degrees outside on a hot day. And the night wasn’t as forgiving. It was about eighteen degrees and raining, so I’m glad there was an awning outside the roof entrance.
“Hey Bee!” Anna hugged me.
“Hey guys,”
Nate smiled at me, watching me walk away, and Anna noticed. Her blue eyes widened. “That guy just checked you out.”
“No he did not.”
“Yes he did! He wanted you.”
“Unfortunately for him, my boyfriend’s here.” I smiled and led them to Sam and Kendall. They were now located at the bar, talking to Steph. This was the first time Anna and Brian came here to see The Debate play. But none of the guys were here besides Sam. “Oh and thanks for saying hello.” I smacked Brian on the arm playfully.
“Sorry, I was just looking around.”
Sam saw us coming and brightened up. He pulled me into him for a hug. “I thought you had left me,”
“As if.” I turned to Kendall. “Kendall, Steph, these are my best friends Anna and Brian. Guys, this is Kendall and Steph.”
“Kendall,” Brian turned the charm on. “So you’re the one who turned Brooke into Cinderella.”
She smiled. “That would be me. I’m a student at Parsons.” She said. “And Brooke was the perfect model.”
“I’m sure you were the perfect designer.”
Anna and I gagged at Brian trying to win over Kendall. I didn’t think those tanned legs and blonde hair would fall for a guy like Brian (even though he was adorably handsome). But apparently, the charm was working, because Kendall and Brian got a drink from Steph and went to go talk at a booth in the corner.
The awful band that was playing before finally ceased making my ears bleed and left the stage. The next band started setting up. “Finally!” Sam yelled with relief. “That band fucking sucked.”
Steph nodded her head. “I don’t know why my dad lets them play. They are truly one of the worst I’ve seen.”
Poor Anna looked completely out of place. “Anna, want something?” I asked.
“Yeah, a cute boyfriend.”
“Well there are plenty of guys around here! Go get one!”
“I think I’ll stay with you.”
“Anna, relax. You look like you have a stick shoved up your ass. Let loose and have some fun!”
“I will, I promise. Just not now.”
I rolled my eyes. “You can’t plan fun.”
“Anna, want to help me?” Steph asked.
“Help you what?”
“Tend to people. It’s pretty fun. One of our waitresses cut out, so I can pay you if you work tonight.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, come on back. I’ll show you the ropes.”
“Cool!”
She smiled at me and went behind the bar. It was just me and Sam now. I sat on his lap while he was sitting on the stool and kissed his cheek. We watched the band set up and I saw Nate get up in front of the crowd. He looked at everyone and said, “Hey, we’re Immaculate Conception; let’s get rolling with ‘Drum roll’.”
They had a power punk/rock thing going on. And Nate’s voice was the gruff kind of mix between Daughtry, Nickleback, and David Strauchman. Nothing compared to Charlie’s voice, but not as terrible as The Parking Lot’s lead singer Joey. In fact, the band probably thought they had those three voices too, because they happened to play Daughtry and Nickleback covers. 
Charlie and the boys showed up and greeted everyone happily. . Neither she or Brian had heard the boys play except at the Wedding, so even though they had that brief introduction once, they didn’t really know them.
“Hey, can I get you boys something to drink?” she asked.
“A tall glass of you,” Charlie smoothly said in his smooth accent. I still hadn’t figured out where he was from. He sounded a little bit like Aaron Johnson when he played John Lennon in Nowhere Boy, but a little bit like when he played Robbie in Angus, Thongs, and perfect Snogging. And that was mixed with a little trace of something I couldn’t figure out.
Anna blushed and I smacked his arm, “Leave Anna alone.”
“I don’t mind, Bee,” she smiled.
“Sorry, Anna. Can I just have water? I can’t drink before I sing, it makes me squeal.”
Sam laughed in agreement with the rest of the band. “That is very true. Remember the time that you got wasted before that show in Vermont?”
“Sure. Everyone else?” she finished taking the order of four waters and brought them back quickly. Charlie asked me, “Are you guys coming with us after the show?”
I looked at Sam and he shrugged. “Whatever my girl wants.”
“Come eat with us, Brooke. You’ll have fun. Bring Anna too,”
“And Brian?”
“Sure! We’ll have a get together.”
“Cool. Sounds like a plan.”
“Awesome.”
After Immaculate Conception finished the song they played by Daughtry, Nate put the mic to his mouth. “Now, there’s a pretty girl out there I’d like to play this for. Brooke from Winchester, Mass, this one’s for you.”
He started playing ‘Girl like That’ by Every Avenue.
Oh shit.
My eyes went wide in horror and as I could see, so were everyone else’s eyes. I could see the confusion on Sam’s face and then… the smoke. Oh shit. He looked at me for an explanation, “What’s the hell is he talking about?”
“When I was looking for Anna and Brian he was backstage. He was a total creeper and that’s all I said to him, I swear. Apparently he doesn’t realize I’m here with you.” I said, hoping this would suffice.
He let out a huge breath through his nose and let out some anger. But it was getting obvious with every lyric Nate sang, that Sam was thinking harder and harder and getting angrier and angrier. “It’s fine,” he finally said, but I knew it wasn’t. “It’s just fine.”
“I promise nothing happened. He just checked me out and I didn’t respond.”
“Brooke. It’s. Fine.”
But he broke away from my hand for a second. His left eyebrow twitched as he thought, and finally he grabbed my waist and pulled me into a deep kiss. Clearly, this was for territorial purposes, so that every guy around would know I was with him. Steph said something to Charlie and Charlie tapped his shoulder. “I’m all for the love, but Jesus Christ, calm down. We’ve got to go set up, Sammy.” Sam broke away and nodded. I stood and so did he, but he didn’t let go of my hand. Apparently I was going back stage too.
He brought me up with him and the boys all tuned backstage As Nate got off stage, Sam pulled me into another deep kiss just to show off. I couldn’t say that I minded, because Sam was such a good kisser. But it felt weird being used to show that I belonged to someone. As Sam kissed me and I told him good luck, Sam passed Nate on his way and whispered something. Nate nodded and looked at me, then quickly walked away.
I went back to the bar to see the boys play and Brian and Kendall were back. “Are you guys going to dinner with us?” I asked.
“I guess so.” He said. “You in?” he asked Kendall.
“Yeah, sure.”
The boys got on stage and everyone cheered for them. They were the night’s Featured Act, so they had the longest set to do. I think they could do like fifteen songs, while all the other acts could only do seven. And that also meant that if the crowd really liked them and were listening, they could go on as long as they wanted.
They rocked, and Sam sang three of the songs. I know he looked for me when he sang them, and I melted. Kendall said, “He’s really good.”
“I know; I don’t even know how. I can’t sing at all, so I guess he has to be good for the both of us,” I smiled.
“He got better when he met you.”
“No way,”
“No seriously. Before he sang the songs and they were good, but now he sings the songs and their really good. I think it’s because he sings them to you.”
“Stop,” I must have blushed from head to toe.
“She’s right.”Steph agreed.
Sam finished up a cover of Every Avenue and Charlie started charming the crowds. “Hello there. I’m Charlie. We’re The Debate. I hope you’re enjoying your evening at The New York Underground, but we’re gonna have to finish up soon and head on home.” The crowd booed and Charlie laughed. “Settle down, people. So, we’re gonna end by serenading you with ‘Hero/Heroine’ and then end the night with ‘Give a Damn’. I must warn you; this first song is dedicated to Sam’s lovely girlfriend Brooke. She seems popular tonight, yeah? So grab that someone you love and dance your little souls out. Here we go.” And off went Derek, starting off the song and Sam coming in with the drums. I actually loved this song. Sam got to sing my favorite part where Martin Johnson sings, “You caught me off guard/now I’m running and screaming” and the backups to the rest. And it was really good. Like, they were amazing.
Finally, when Charlie sang ‘Give a Damn’ people went crazy. It was exactly his style and he got to be a little theatrical with his facial expressions. I would give them nine out of ten stars if I was reviewing them. Everyone was jumping around and singing along, especially when Charlie went nuts and went around trying to get the crowd to sing the song too. It worked. When they were finished, you couldn’t hear a bomb explode because it was so loud from all the screaming.
I made my way backstage and ran into Sam’s arms and kissed him. “You guys were awesome.”
“Lovebirds cut that out, will you? I want to pack up and leave.” Charlie said. I just smiled and kept kissing Sam, tugging at the hair at the back of his neck. “Let’s go!” Charlie yelled again. We separated, smiling, and Sam said to wait out in the lounge for them. A lot of people had already left, so Anna and Steph were behind the bar cleaning up and Kendall and Brian were looking cozy together.

We all drove back to Boston for four hours in our separate cars; Charlie and the rest of the guys in a van. Anna, Brian, and Kendall in Brian’s car, and me and Sam in the impala. We met back at Sam’s apartment. I hadn’t been here yet. We actually arrived first; Sam had gotten a lot more comfortable around me, so he drove a little faster when he could. “So this is home,” I said when he unlocked the door and it opened to a nice sized flat. It was mostly brick on the inside and it wasn’t too messy, just what you’d normally see when five guys live together.
“Yeah, this is home.”
“I like it.”
“Get comfy.”
“How many beds do you guys have?”
“Two. Whoever puts the most into rent gets the bedrooms. So, me and Derek get them. But Derek only works hard for the bedroom so he can have his girlfriends over.” Sam winked. He worked as a part-time mechanic during the week so he could pay for other things besides rent. He didn’t really have a choice; Boston was an expensive place to live, even though I knew his dad helped him out a lot.
I sat on the couch and Sam sat with me. “Charlie’s wicked slow, so I don’t even know when they’ll be back.”
“What time is it?”
“Uh, almost five.”
“God, I’m tired.”
“Are you hungry?”
“No. Just exhausted.”
“Me too; want to go to bed?”
“Mhmm.”
“Come on.”
He took my hand and led me to his bedroom that was bigger than I expected, but still quite small. The brick was in here too, and he had his bed all messed up. I collapsed on the bed and he got on the other side and chuckled, pulling the covers up over me. He slid in beside me and I cuddled into his chest and closed my eyes. “Brooke?” he asked.
“Huh?”
“Can you not wear that dress when we go out?”
“Mmm, why?”
“I don’t like the way the guys were looking at you.”
I smiled to myself; he was protecting me, and it was cute.
“Okay, Sammy?”
“Yeah?”
“Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.”

                        *                                  *                                  *

Anna was asleep on Charlie’s heaving stomach on the couch. Brian was asleep on the table and Kendall was asleep the floor. Both Brian and Charlie were snoring loudly; mouths open and heavy breathing. Sam was still sleeping when I woke up around eight. Three hours of sleep and I was awake. But, Sam had no shades in his room, so the sun woke me up. I made my way to the kitchen in search for coffee. I needed coffee. And guess what? They had none. No coffee maker, no coffee ice cream in the freezer. Now what the hell was I supposed to do? I grabbed my jacket from the bar and put on my heels and made my way down the elevator. I was on a mission: for coffee.
I saw a starbucks after a few blocks and practically ran there. So what if I was wearing four inch heels and wearing a short ass dress in the cold eight a.m. air? I needed coffee. I got a bunch of looks from everyone around me. Some guys down at a diner whistled as I walked by and people kept staring. I almost screamed out with joy as I walked into starbucks. I got in line and when I finally got there, the barista said, “I think you need coffee.”
And I replied, “I think you’re so right. I’ll have a venti Sumatra please.”
“Room for cream?”
“No thanks. As much coffee as possible please.”
“You got it.”
So she got it for me and I downed it by the time I made it back to the Sam’s place. Everyone was still sleeping, so I went back into Sam’s room and collapsed on his bed with a groan. He opened one of his brown eyes and checked out his surroundings, then reached for me and pulled me into his arms, planting a kiss on my mouth. “Good morning.”
“Ugh. Hi, why are you up so early?”
“I can’t sleep when there’s light outside. I have issues.”
“Clearly. Why do you smell like coffee?”
“Because I went to starbucks and got myself a coffee. You know I can’t function without it.”
“How’d you get there?”
“I walked.”
“It’s like eight blocks…”
“Sam.” I said firmly. “I needed coffee.”
He laughed. “Okay, okay, come here.”
We kind of laid there for a while until Sam finally got up. He wasn’t wearing a shirt like he was earlier. Unfair, I had to wear my tight blue dress to bed. He threw his signature black tee on and walked out into the living room and then the kitchen. He was wearing blue plaid pajama pants now, so we kind of matched except I WASN’T WEARING PAJAMAS. I WAS IN A DAMN DRESS.
“How is it fair that you got to change out of your clothes and I didn’t?”
“I would’ve let you borrow something of mine, Brooke. You know that.”
“I know but I was so tired.”
“Maybe you should leave something comfy here so next time you can change. I’ll even let you have your own drawer.”
“You’ll let me have a drawer? No, no, it’s my drawer now. I command one.”
“Okay, you got it.” He kissed me again and opened the fridge. Then he turned to me. “Oh right, we have no food. We never have any food.”
Anna woke up with her usually startled jump and she hit Charlie in the face. He grunted and sat up, knocking Anna off the couch. She kicked Kendall’s leg and she woke up too. Sam found some cereal in the cupboard and sat at the table, waking up Brian. Now everyone was pretty much up.
They all groaned awake. “Good morning!” Sam yelled, looking as chipper as ever. Everyone mumbled, “Morning,” and came into the kitchen looking for food. As they all realized, Sam told them, “We have no food.”
So, we all got our stuff together after waking up Sean, Derek, and Scott and headed towards the nearest diner. Sam greeted the waitress by name and we all sat down, grabbing the menus. After we ordered, we all made useless chatter. Finally, after a while of listening to Charlie telling a story, I couldn’t help myself. I had to know where he was from. “Charlie, where are you from?”
He looked at me and smiled. “I was born in Dublin and after my folks died, I moved in with my Aunt in London until I was 17, and now I’m here.”
Now this makes sense. An Irish/English accent completely fit him. “That’s so cool. I’m glad you moved here. If you didn’t, Sammy wouldn’t have met you, and you wouldn’t be The Debate. And I wouldn’t have run into him again.” I turned and kissed him on the cheek. He smiled and everyone awwed. Kendall spoke next, with her deeper voice than you’d expect her to have. “Guys, you must be the cutest couple alive. It’s gross. Stop it.”
“We’ll try.” He said.
Everyone was exhausted, so after we finished eating, they were all heading to the apartment again. Brian pointed at his wrist, as if to indicate the time, even though he had no watch on. I nodded and stopped Sam’s hand from walking away. “What’s up?”
“Uh, I have to head home…”
He frowned. “No. Stay.”
“I want to, but I can’t. Brian and Anna are leaving and they’re my ride home. I have a shitload of homework to do.”
“Isn’t it vacation soon?”
“In April. Late April. Next month you can have me for a while. But for now, I have to go.”
“Brooke. Stay.” He insisted.
“Sam. I really can’t.”
“I’ll drive you home later.”
“Sammy, I know you will but I really can’t. “
“Fine.” He said letting go of my hand. He turned around to walk away.
“Are you mad?” He looked back at me and walked back towards me.
“No. I just really wanted you to stay. The weekend is practically the only time I see you and I miss you during the week. I just want you for a little more time.”
“Um… let me go talk to them, okay?”
He let a smile tug at the corner of his mouth. “Okay, I’ll be by the car.”
I walked over to Anna and Brian. “You all set?” he asked.
“Um, Sam said he could drive me home later.”
Anna’s face dropped. “Bee, I thought we were going to study and go to the movies?”
“I know A, but he misses me and I miss him. We don’t really see each other during the week so we might as well make the most of it while we can.”
“Seriously? You’re going to ditch us for him?”
“I’m not ditching you. We can go to the movies tomorrow.”
“Hm, you’re not coming home with us because you’re going to stay here with him. I would say that’s ditching.”
“Brian? A little help here?”
He shrugged at me. “I’m kind of on Anna’s side here.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah.”
“Guys, come on.”
“No, go ahead and have fun with him. I won’t cover for you though.” She said. And then she got in the car with a slam and told Brian to drive. He waved at me sympathetically and drove away. I put my hands over my face and rubbed, and then I found Sam sitting on the hood of his car.
“You good?”
“Yeah. Super.”
“Because you don’t look fine.”
“Anna’s just mad at me because we had plans after studying and I broke them to be with you. Whatever.”
“You can go if it’s that important.”
“No. I want to stay with you.”
“Good,” he slid off the hood and got in the car. He drove back to the apartment with his hand on my knee the whole way. “Do you need to take a shower?” he asked. I smelled my skin.
“Are you trying to tell me something?” I asked him, laughing.
“Of course not. You’ve just been wearing that dress for a few hours and I’m sure you want to shower.”
“I have no clothes.”
“Kendall’s here. You can go shopping.”
“I don’t have any money.”
“It’s on me.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, we may not have made a killing, but I still have money  a little from work. Brooke, go shopping with Kendall.”
I relented. “Fine.”
So, when we got back to Sam’s, he just pointed at Kendall and said. “Kendall. Brooke. Shopping. Go.”
She jumped off of the couch coolly, “We’re going shopping?”
“Yes.” Sam said, handing me a wad of cash. “And if anyone takes  a shower and there’s no hot water for Brooke when we get back, I will you’re your asses.” Everyone nodded and he turned to me, “Please, my baby girl, don’t make me go broke. Just find something adorable for yourself to wear so other guys don’t want you all day long.”
“Alright,” I kissed him, heading out the door. “Ready Kendall?”
“Yes.”
We took the elevator, because I was still wearing these awful heels.
“Where are we going?”
“Lola’s.”
“Who’s?”
“Lola’s! It’s this great vintage shop down on Harvard. I go there any chance I can and I know you’ll look good in anything.”
“I trust you.”
“Good!” So we took the T and walked the rest of the way to Lola’s Urban Vintage. She told me not even to look. She just grabbed a whole bunch of items and sent me to the dressing room really quickly. “So, you and Sam.” She called, rustling through other racks.
“What about me and Sam?”
“You like him?”
“Yes,”
“Really like him?”
“Well, yeah. He’s sweet and funny and cute and a little bit dangerous.”
“He’s a lot dangerous.” She said seriously.
“What do you mean?”
“He has a temper on him; a really bad temper.”
“I know.”
I walked out of the dressing room wearing a pair of skinny jeans that were a little too tight around the waist and a yellow and black striped top that flowed out. “I don’t think you do.”
“I know that he’s been in a few fights, had a few misdemeanors… I know. Anna and Brian have warned me. His brother has warned me. Hell, he warned me. I think he just needs to be loved a bit.”
She looked at me sideways and frowned a little. “Take off that awful outfit. Yellow does nothing for your skin tone.” So I went back into the changing room as she handed me another outfit to try on. Another pair of skinny jeans and a maroon colored long sleeve shirt. When I came out she looked at me and smiled, making me turn so she could see how the jeans fit. “I can hem these if you like them. They’re a little too long for you, so they make you look shorter than you are.” I nodded and she handed me a vest that was black and simple. It went perfectly with the shirt. “You know he really likes you?” she told me.
“He does?”
“Yeah, more than any other girl I’ve ever seen him with. The way he looks at you; I can just tell that he adores you and he’s going to spoil the hell out of you. And that’s why I’m worried about you. He’s no good for you.”
“Why not?”
“Because when Sam really likes something, he does everything in his power to protect it. And sometimes, the way he protects is not pretty.”
“Oh,” I thought for a moment and bit my lip. “Well, thank you for your concern, but I think I can handle myself out there. I really like him too.” I winked.
She smiled. “I knew it!” she jumped up and down and beamed.
“Knew what?”
“I knew that you were perfect for him.” then she told me to change, and to look at the shoes with her, and to try on a pair of flats, and to hand over the money, and to walk back to Sam’s. “Can we stop for coffee?” I asked.
“Yeah, sure.”
We stopped at the same starbucks I went to that morning and got two frappuccinos; one for me, one for Sam. As soon as I got in, I handed him his drink and he kissed me thank you and asked where my new outfit was. I told him that I needed to get it washed, so he grabbed a wad of quarters from his pocket and grabbed my hand and the bag. “Let’s go!”
“Let me change into my flats at least.” So I put on my brand new black and sparkly flats and Sam put his arms around me as we walked to the nearest laundry mat. We put the clothes in and watched them wash and spin and wash and spin. Sam sat me on the top of a washer and pecked me playfully all around my face and putting his fingers through my hair and playing with it. “So, did you and Kendall have fun?”
“Yeah, we didn’t spend much so here’s your money back.”
He took it and frowned, “Let’s go out later.”
“What?”
“A movie and dinner. Or dinner and a movie, whatever you want.”
“Okay…” I thought for a second and gave him a half smile. “Do you know what Kendall told me earlier?” I asked him as he took my hands and swung them around like a little kid.
“What?”
“That you like me.”
“Mhmm,”
“That you really, really like me.”
“Did she now?” he looked away like he wasn’t even paying attention, but I could see the smile creeping up the corners of his mouth.
“Mhmm, yep, she did.”
“Well, she’d be damn right.”
“But she also told me that you’re no good for me.”
“Hm, and what did you think about that?”
“Well she told me one other thing that I believe to be a tad bit more truthful.”
“Which was…?”
“That you’re perfect for me.”
He looked at me straight into my green eyes and kissed me like he did that first night we went to New York. I could hear The Helpless playing that depressing song and Sam was on the same page. “Love of mine, one day you will day you will die, but I’ll be close behind. I’ll follow you into the dark.” He whispered against my lips. Then he asked. “How do you feel about the words now?”
“No blinding light or tunnels to gates of light. Just our hands clasped so tight begging for the hint of a spark.”
He let out a chuckle with his nose to my nose and his forehead to my forehead. “You can’t sing sweetheart.” He pecked my lips and leaned back, hearing the buzzer of my new clothes. “Let me be the singer, okay?”
“Deal,”
He put the clothes in the dryer and sat on the washer next to me while we waited. He grabbed his iPod and we listened to classic songs by all of our favorite bands. He got the left ear bud and I got the right. We held hands and listened to “I want to hold your hand” by The Beatles, “I wanna be sedated” by The Ramones, and “I want you to want me” by Cheap Trick, and finally “Make me wanna die” by The Pretty Reckless.  Apparently, his iPod was in a “want to/wanna” mood. After a few other songs, the dryer was done and we walked back to the apartment.
I needed to shower, so when we got home, Sam showed me how to the use the faucet because apparently if you didn’t do it a certain way your water would go from scalding to ice in two seconds. I showered really quickly without washing my hair and changed into my new clothes. When I came out, I went into Sam’s room and threw my dress and heels into the corner. I took out the feather earrings I had worn all night too and put them on his dresser. Then I went and sat on his lap on the couch. Everyone was just talking, so I talked along with them until Kendall realized she had to get home in order to finish one of her projects. She was working on my jeans as I sat there and when she was finished, she got up to say goodbye. She hugged me and told me to watch myself, but that she’d see me soon. Then she went with Charlie and Sean, who were taking her to the train station. That left me, Scott, and Derek. So, we hung out on the couch all day long talking and doing absolutely nothing but being lazy and watching tv.
But eventually Sam and I went out to dinner at a local Italian restaurant and went to see a movie about a group of college kids that get massacred at their college. After that, we headed back and we realized we were alone because Scott and Derek had gone to see a band they were friends with play locally. Sam asked if I wanted to go, but I said no. We’d spent a lot of time with everyone else, but not really alone besides when we were driving or at the laundry mat. So he sat on the couch and I rested my head on his stomach as we just watched tv and hung out. I loved hanging out with him; I even loved the way he was trying not to swear around me. It didn’t work though. He wasn’t like the Sam I met in the Impala where he told me I looked like a hooker; he was different in a good way. But, I noticed that he came off a little rude when he talked to people. And he didn’t really care about what people thought. He was so carefree it was admirable.
“What are you thinking about right now?” I asked.
“Why the fuck I haven’t kissed you in a few hours.”
I laughed and so did he; making his stomach bob up and down so my head did too. He leaned over and kissed me softly and pushed my bangs back from my face and pecked my forehead. “You never did tell me what you thought of the words to our song.”
“Ooh, we have a song now?”I smirked. He found my hand that was rested on my thigh and intertwined his fingers with mine.
“You keep avoiding the question. Should I take this personally?”
“Absolutely not; I just think that you can sing the words for their entirety now and it would be true.”
“Really?”
“Mhmm,” I bit my lip and waited for his response. His palm became sweaty in mine and his Adam’s apple bobbed. “Brooke,” he said, swallowing. I nodded, waiting for what he was about to say. “I love you, Brooke.” I smiled smally; mostly to myself. I covered my face because I got embarrassed and he lifted my hands off. “I love you too,” I whispered. Now it was his turn to smile awkwardly. I don’t think he expected me to say it back, but I did because I meant it. I had never said it before to anyone besides my family and a few friends. “Yep, I love you.”
“You love me?” he asked as if he hadn’t just said it two seconds ago.
“I love you, I love you, I love you.” I sang. He covered my mouth with his hand. “What did I say about singing?” I giggled and sat up, leaning into him and brushing my lips against his. He shuddered and kissed me a little harder, making me laugh while he did it. “What is so funny?” he demanded, chuckling while he asked.
“I don’t know, I just didn’t think you loved me.”
“Oh,” he pursed his lips, seriously. “I do.”
He helped me take off my vest and just continued loving me up until we were down on the couch with both of our shirts off and our lips leaving a trail of fire everywhere. He found my sweet spot, which was my collar bone and it made me shudder every time he pressed his mouth there. My hands found the back of his hair and pulled on it so he would get closer to me.
The door flung open and Scott called, “We brought you back some pizza!”
Sam shot up on the couch with a red flame in his eyes and yelled, “Get. The. Fuck. Out!” So loudly, I guffawed and covered my mouth so he wouldn’t hear. He was so pissed it was amusing, because I knew he was enjoying our little hook up a just as much as I was.
I heard Scott yell, “Sorry mate!” while Derek cackled hysterically in the background. They left the door slam shut and Sam got up and buried his face in his hands. The flame was still burning. “Brooke. I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine!”
“No, it’s not fine.”
“Sammy,” I got up, putting my chin on his shoulder and kissing it. “It’s okay. We needed a referee anyways. I’m tired, and I should really get home.”
“Home?” he chuckled, laughing off some of that excess anger he still held for the boys waiting in the hallway. “Babe, it’s almost eleven. You’re staying the night.”
“I am?”
“Yeah, I’m not going to take you home now. How would your parents like you coming home that late?”
“Well, I guess they wouldn’t like it...”
“Put on your shirt please, I don’t need Scott and Derek seeing how perfect you are too.”
I blushed and headed for Sam’s room. “Can I borrow one of yours?” I asked.
“Top drawer; pants are in the bottom.”
“Thank you.” I hollered as I changed into his A Rocket to The Moon band shirt and comfy grey sweats. They weren’t too baggy, and the shirt wasn’t too big. It’s not like Sam was a big guy, but he obviously wasn’t my size, because I was a girl and he was a boy. I looked in the mirror in the bathroom before heading back to sit on the couch and liked what I saw. I liked the feel of his clothes; they smelled clean, and they smelled deliciously like him. He was clean and that was a great sign for me.
I put my hair in a messy bun and sat on the couch. “You all set?” he asked. I nodded and he went over to the door to let the boys in. They were drunk, especially Scott. I could barely understand him with his drunken British accent. “Mayte, are you and yeh la-y friend aw dressed?”
“Derek,” Sam said firmly. “Get him to bed please?”
Derek nodded, trying not to laugh at Sam’s instructions and helped Scott into his room stumbling along the way. When Derek didn’t have a lady friend over, Scott slept on the air mattress on the floor. He closed the door with a slam and I just looked at Sam. “Is he always this… interesting?”
“If you mean, is he always this drunk? Then yes, he is always that interesting.”
“Are you the normal one?” I asked, grabbing for his waist and pulling him next to me.
“...Charlie.”
“Maybe I should I date him then. The rest of you all seem to be so very strange.”
He looked at me straight. “Do not touch Charlie.”
“Sam, I was kidding. I don’t want Charlie, I only want you.”
He relaxed a little bit and took in a breath. “You ready for bed?”
“If you mean, am I ready for bed? Then yes, I am ready for bed.” He laughed and went into his room. I brushed my teeth in their bathroom with my finger (I liked Sam, but wasn’t really interested in his toothbrush germs), and splashed my face with water before returning to the brick and blue walls. I climbed in the bed and watched as he took off his black tee and threw it in the pile against his door. His body was long and lean, and I couldn’t help but feel lucky that he was mine. He lifted the covers and jumped in the bed, getting close to me so I could cuddle against him like last night. Then we fell asleep listening to each other’s heartbeats.
I felt so safe; I could just stay in that bed forever.

Smiles,
Leslie

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